I have not updated everyone on my health for some time. So here it goes.
My health isn’t the best. My kidney is working but not the best. I am now having a lot of gastrointestinal problems including frequent constipation, nausea, vomiting, and pain. This month I’ll have an endoscopy to hopefully learn something.
I’m on more medications than I have ever been on before. I’m taking
Psychologically I’m not the best either.
I’m still struggling with major depressive disorder and PTSD. they have been interfering with my sleep and daily functions.
I am not the best at all. I am worried. I am stressed. I feel that I am not doing enough. I feel as though I am not enough. I feel that there’s more I could do. I am disappointed, frustrated, and overwhelmed. I’m struggling to see the light and I feel like a burden.
Why do I feel like this?
I am feeling this way for a number of reasons. Because I am afraid that my health may be declining and that I may never improve. Because I am worried that I may lose my Social Security disability case. Because I feel that there is more I could do to help the Dean’s with household chores and that I need to pay for more of my living expenses. Because I feel that I will never finish my education. Because I want to work and I cannot. Because I wanted to do more on the Bernie campaign but I was limited by my body. Because I want to work on campaigns right now but I cannot. Because I feel trapped in this body. Because I feel as though my biological family should be around to help out.
Because I am not doing the best and cannot work. I struggle to pay for things I need and, to be honest, some of the things that help make this life more bearable such as a book or two.
I am trying to raise money to help cover some of my bills including paying for those health care costs that are not covered by Medicaid and to pay for those other little things that make life more bearable.